Stars
by xxLoverOfWrittenArtxx
Summary: Dib's thoughts as he looks up at the Stars one night. Tiny bit of ZADR. Most likely gonna be a two shot.
1. Chapter 1

_Stars. _

I used to sit up on my roof when I was a kid and look at them for hours.

Wondering... what's out there.

Was there Life?

Was there Death?

Or was there just Nothing?

I used to feel so small when I looked up at the endless space.

What did I matter when there was so much more out there?

_Stars._

It's been years since I sat on my roof to look at them.

I decided tonight that I would,

and it was the right choice.

They haven't lost any of their beauty.

They're still gorgeous.

But they have lost some of their past meaning.

I know what's out there.

I know because it came down here.

_He_ came down here.

And he made the stars pale in comparison to him.

Not because he was beautiful, even though he certainly thought he was.

But because while the stars were far away and interesting to look at,

he was here and he was stunning.

His skin; his eyes; his antenna; his ego; his defect.

From day one he enraptured me.

And I was just as attention grabbing to him as he was to me.

We fought everyday and sometimes at night.

At least, while we were kids.

Then came the teenage years, with hormones and growth spurts (for both of us).

We still fought, of course; it's who we were, what first drew us to each other.

Without our fights, we weren't ourselves.

But they weren't as bloody and they never got as close to killing someone as before.

Usually, the fights we did have ended in the bedroom.

_Stars._

They came down, eventually.

Not the stars, obviously, but them.

His people.

His Tallest and the Armada.

They told him why he was on Earth and what he was; a defect.

Then they left, leaving him banished to this planet, never to leave.

If he left they would kill him.

He stayed and we went back to our routine.

For a while.

Because he came down from the stars and he had to go back to the stars eventually.

Even if that meant dying, even if it meant leaving me down here.

One night, he said 'good night' and I knew he really meant 'good bye'.

So I told him the three words he had never let me say before.

And he knew what I really meant was 'its okay. I'll be here if you come back'.

He was gone when the stars faded from view.

_Stars._

It hurts to look up at them.

I knew it would.

It hurts because I know he is up there somewhere in that space that once seemed so big.

It hurts because I don't know if he is up there somewhere, alive.

It hurts because even though I said I would be here if he came back, I know that is a very big 'if'.

It hurts.

But the pain is good.

It lets me remember that he was real and he was here.

This pain only makes the stars seem brighter.

_Stars._

I think I will come up here tomorrow night.

Bring a blanket.

Lay back.

Look up.

And gaze at the stars, hurting because he is up there and I am still down here.

A/N: I'm... not sure where this came from. Obviously Dib thinking about Zim. Um... this is what I get for allowing a character to think for themselves. Review?

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. Only this angst ridden little thing.


	2. Chapter 2

Stars.

I can't go up on the roof anymore.

It's impossible.

Not because of how much it had started to hurt when I did.

But because the smoke chokes the oxygen up that high.

The smoke from the fires.

The fires that are burning the world.

But not my house.

Stars.

Even so, I use a telescope every night when it's clear enough to see.

They manage to shine through usually.

A beacon of many things.

To some, a beacon of hope,

that maybe this torture will stop.

Maybe the fires will stop.

Maybe the invasion will stop.

To me, a beacon of wishes.

I wish that the torturer will come home.

I wish the fire-starter will come home.

I wish my invader will come home.

And he will.

Stars.

That's why my house alone, out of the entire world, will not burn.

My yard is not a mass grave.

My food is not half rotten garbage.

My life is not filled with terror and fear.

Because _he_ will not let his soldiers touch me.

Only he can touch me.

Whether it be a caress or a punishment.

It is only dealt by his claw.

Stars.

He came back, that much must be obvious by now.

He said 'hello'.

I said 'hello'.

And we both knew we meant 'I missed you'.

Stars.

It seems silly now, when I think about how much looking up at the stars used to hurt.

Or perhaps, it just seems unneeded now.

Now that I know what he really left for.

What he was really doing while he was gone.

Now that I know he always planned on coming back for me.

But, he told me, he couldn't come back until he did something.

He became Tallest.

That's why, he told me, Red and Purple had came to Earth actually.

Because he had grown too tall in the lower gravity.

Because he could challenge them to the Tallest rank.

They are dead now,

dead like so many humans.

And I regret none of them.

Stars.

Tonight will be the last time I will be able to see the stars from my telescope.

Tomorrow, the Earth is scheduled to be destroyed.

Utterly, completely destroyed.

Wiped off the plane of existence.

Not a single human will survive.

Except me, but I don't classify as human in the Irken Empire.

Humans, or any species not Irken, could only reach the rank of slave.

I am much more important.

I am the Taller.

I am the mate of the Tallest.

Many humans have come to my house since the invasion started.

They ask me why and how and what kind of monster am I that I can watch my race die?

I laugh, but not because I enjoy their pain.

I laugh because they do not understand.

They say he will leave me here again, like he did before.

That our mating is only a lie to keep the one person that knows their weaknesses out of the way.

But they do not understand, and they never will.

Stars.

They do not understand how much it used to hurt.

They do not understand how many times I cried myself to sleep under the stars.

They do not understand how long I would have waited for him to come back.

But he does.

He does because he felt the same pain.

The hurt.

The tears.

The waiting until he could come back.

He felt it all and he understands.

So he could never leave me again.

Stars.

Tonight, I gaze through the smoke at the stars.

Wonder about what is up there.

Life?

Death?

Nothing?

And tomorrow night, I will look out the Lounge window and I will see different stars.

Tomorrow night, I will not have to wonder, because I'll know.

And I will gaze at those stars up there with him.

A/N: Didn't really end the way I wanted, but what can you expect from something you never meant to write in the first place? Still, came out better than I thought it would. I would love to hear your thoughts on this, even if it's just a short 'WTF were you on when you wrote this?'. Please try to be a little nice though. Thanks.


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